Saturday, October 18, 2014

Life without marriage

What if I were to never get married?

What if I were to live my life with no romantic relationships, without that sort of relational intimacy?

Would I look upon my past with regret and resentment, bitter over what I never had?

Or would I choose to be grateful for the wonderful life that I was able to experience?

What about looking forward now? What if I were told that I would never have a romantic partner?

Would I look to the future with dread and sorrow, grieving over lost possibilities?

Or would I choose to believe that life is filled with richness, wonder, and glory, regardless of whether I am in a romantic relationship with another person?

I still would like to get married, to find that romantic partner. Yet I have been musing over how to live in contentment. So much of the present narrative is that my life would be incomplete without a spouse. The modern American church (which has an illustrious history of people devoted to celibacy) has done a poor job of capturing a theology of singleness, treating it as a temporary condition that needs to be cured by the panacea of matrimony.

In present times, discussion of marriage can become politically and theologically intense. This is good, for marriage is important, and it is good to discuss important things. But marriage is not everything. It is possible to have a wonderful, amazing, worthwhile life without marriage or romance.

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